TF2 Weapon Reviews: The Force-A-Nature

   The Force-A-Nature(abbreviated to FaN) is an unlockable primary weapon for the Scout. It holds two shots per clip, and carries 32 shots. This weapon fires shells with 12 pellets per shot, that do 11-43 damage at medium range, which means both shots fired at medium range will do 22-86 damage, which is not enough to kill any class. At close range, the FaN does 92-113 damage per shot, and at long range the FaN does 3-11 damage per shot. Crits do 194.4 damage. The time between shots is 0.315 seconds, and the reload speed is 1.652 seconds. The FaN reloads by clips, reloading both chambers at the same time. The FaN also knocks back targets and the shooter when fired, allowing the Scout to use the knockback as a triple jump, as well as to knock targets away. If you reload the FaN without using both shots, both shots will be wasted anyway.

What, how do you kill Terminators?

    To be quite honest, I don't like the FaN. I think it's the worst Scout primary. However, it does has its occasional moment of glory, in the form of blasting enemies into environmental hazards, or doing ridiculous amounts of damage at close range. Seriously, it can kill any class but a Heavy in two point-blank shots. However, if it doesn't kill them, you may find yourself pressed for time while it reloads. It carries 17 clips, allowing you to sneak around without needing too many ammo boxes. The FaN is absolutely terrible at longer ranges, being even worse than the Scattergun in that regard. But if you can get in there, the damage and the knockback make this gun a more literal Force of Nature.

I may say this many more times into the future, but
sometimes, Valve is just awesome like this.

As a Scout, this weapon fits your role of ambushes and hit-and-run attacks very nicely. The increase in bullets means you don't have to be as accurate, while the high damage at close range can utterly destroy most classes before they can even react. And if they attempt to charge at you, the knockback can make sure you live to Scout another day. However, the small clip size and slow reload speed leaves you vulnerable once you unleash your shots. This weapon specializes in destroying close-range enemies, and using its knockback in a variety of ways.

At close range, unleashing both of your barrels can do between 184-226 damage before you have to reload, delivered in the same time it takes for the Scattergun to deliver one shot. Which is ridiculous, to say the least. Wow. However, this two-hit kill comes with a cost. The reload speed! Gasp! The reload speed is the same as the first shot reloaded of a Scattergun doubled, which is all well and good...but you can't fire while reloading. With a Scattergun, you take twice the time to fire, but half the time to reload, making running an essential part of your plans.

You heard the man. Buy the freakin' shirt!

TF2 Weapon Reviews: The Scattergun

The Scattergun is the stock primary weapon for the Scout. It holds 6 shots when fully loaded, and carries 32 ammo. This weapon fires shells with 10 pellets per shot, that do 10-40 damage at medium range, which means a full clip emptied at medium range will do 60-240 damage, which is enough to kill any class except the Heavy at maximum damage. At close range, the Scattergun does 90-105 damage per shot, and at long range the Scattergun does 3-10 damage per shot. Crits do 180 damage per shot. The time between shots is 0.625 seconds, and the reload speed is 0.56 seconds per shell. The Scattergun reloads shell by shell.

Where do you think you are? You're in the Badlands, baby!
(Guns and Roses begins blasting)

The Scattergun is the default Scout primary weapon, and as such, shows you what it means to be a Scout. A close-range Scattergun blast can even more damage than the Shotgun. No other weapon slot can compare to the sheer amount of close-range damage. However, it is weaker than the Pistol at longer ranges, making it hard to get foes at the back lines without switching weapons. It carries the equivalent of 6.34 'clips.' It is best used at point-blank range, doing enough damage to kill any foe within five direct point-blank shots, including a fully overhealed Heavy, presuming it isn't being pocketed by a Medic. Good lord.

You're kinda screwed. Actually, everyone on your team is kinda screwed.

As a Scout, the Scattergun is your most simply effective weapon, dealing enough damage at close range to kill most classes in two or three shots. This often makes your melee weapon useless, as the Scattergun does much more damage. However, once the enemy flees to even medium range, the Scattergun becomes even worse than the Shotgun, making it a good idea to have a longer-range weapon like the Pistol. There are two things this weapon can help with: close-range destruction, and distracting enemies.

At close range, the Scattergun does between 90 and 105 damage per shot. Two shots with this will kill a Soldier at full health. It's a little bit ridiculous in that respect. However, in order to do that kind of damage, you have to be within melee range or very close to it, making Pyros, Heavies, and other classes that can pump out far too much damage per second a big problem. Luckily, you can probably kill them before they kill you because of the second thing this weapon is good at.

Wait, Scout actually looks like a badass in this concept art.
This is SCOUT. Rainbows make him cry. He is not meant to be badass...right?

The second thing that the Scattergun excels at is distracting and annoying foes. Well, to be fair, that is what Scout is meant to do anyway, but this weapon is especially good at it. You see, once you get into melee range, that enemy you've been stalking has the chance you kill you before you can close in for the kill. However, your speed and jumping ability allows you to run around making sure he can't do much damage to you before your Scattergun kills him. Three shots and he's out, and you live to fight another day.

Catch a Heavy by the toe, if he hollers SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE.
Also that bottom concept art reminds me of the Baby Face's Blaster,
while the one above it looks like the FaN.

Seeing as the Scattergun is a stock weapon, pretty much anything can go well with it. However, I think I can narrow it down a little more...

• The Pistol. Well, it's the Scout's stock secondary. Of course they work well together, because they were made to work well together. For a more specific reason, the Scattergun is only effective at close range. It needs a source for reliable ranged damage, and the Pistol is more than willing to oblige.
• Bonk! Atomic Punch is a more situational soda. However, the situation it is meant to be used in is people shooting at you, and due to your annoying Scout nature, that will show up a lot more than you'd think. Once you're invincible, dash past all of those sentries, Heavies, and whatever else may be in your way, to shoot that one spawn-camping Sniper in the back of the line. The Bonk! can help you get in there and kill whatever annoyances are greater than you.
• The Flying Guillotine is an incredibly helpful weapon in general, but it fills a role that the Scattergun can't fill: ranged damage. If you are accurate with your shots, the Guillotine can fill the role of your Pistol more effectively than the Pistol can, due to the increased damage of the initial hit, as well as the bleed over time. It even recharges fairly quickly. What's not to love?
• The Sandman pairs nicely with the Scattergun, due to its stun ball. Once you hit your foe upside the head with a baseball, you can run in there and kill the guy with your Scattergun before the stun wears off. Plus, if you use it with the Guillotine, the sheer damage can take care of a foe without even needing to waste your Scattergun ammo. How d'you like that, Heavy? Not so smart without your 200-dollar bullets firing away, are ya?!
• The Atomizer is a generally good melee weapon for the Scout. Since your Scattergun will far outperform your melee weapon in melee range anyway, the penalty for using it is negligible. The triple jump that it grants, however, is absolutely worth the damage you take for doing it. Anything that makes you more mobile will also make you more annoying to the other team, and annoyance is how the Scout works.
• Some of the best loadouts for the Scattergun are Scattergun-Pistol/Pocket Pistol-Atomizer and Scattergun-Flying Guillotine-Sandman.

In the end, the Scattergun is a solid weapon for doing what a Scout does best. You can jump around, end up right behind an enemy, and shoot their face in before they can see you. Then flee before the Pyro can chase you down and incinerate you. Good times.

His face. LOOK AT HIS FACE. IT ISN'T REAL.

TF2 Weapon Reviews: The Shovel/Stock Melee Weapon

   This weapon review will be different from any other weapon review, as it will be explaining three basic weapons, as opposed to a specific weapon from a specific class. These weapons are the Shotgun, the Pistol, and the Shovel. The Shovel is just an example, the same stats apply to the stock melee weapons of the Pyro, Demoman, Heavy, Medic and Sniper. This Weapon Review is about the Shovel/Fire Axe/Lollichop/Bottle/Scottish Handshake/Fists/Apoco-Fists/Bonesaw/Kukri/Saxxy/Conscientious Objector/Frying Pan, as all of those weapons have the same stats.

   The stock melee weapon is exactly what it sounds like, namely the stock melee weapon, for the Soldier, Pyro, Demoman, Heavy, Medic, and Sniper. It does 65 damage per swing, which can kill a Scout, Engineer, Sniper, or Spy in two hits. Crits do 195 damage, which can kill any class except Soldier and Heavy in one hit. The time between swings is 0.8 seconds, making it slower than the Shotgun and less damaging. As I mentioned, stats are the same across the Shovel, Fire Axe, Bottle, Fists, Bonesaw, and Kukri. The Lollichop has the same stats, but will take you to Pyroland. The Scottish Handshake is just a reskin of the Bottle. The Apoco-Fists have the same stats as the Fists, but make enemies explode, or gib, when you kill them. The Saxxy can be used by any class, has the same stats as the default melee weapon of that class, and turns enemies into Australium statues on a kill. The Conscientious Objector is a reskin of the default melee weapon of every class but Engineer and Spy. The Frying Pan is a reskin of the default melee weapon of every class except the Engineer and Spy, as well as having unique sounds.
   The stock melee weapon is a good player's last resort. Once you run out of all other ammo, or manage to get it close without having a Shotgun loaded, a well-timed swing can usually keep foes at bay long enough to get reinforcements or to load a weapon. As it is only a close-range weapon, the stock melee weapon should only be used as an ambush weapon, or any time when the opponent cannot counterattack.
   As a Soldier, the Shovel is surprisingly helpful, as your Rocket Launcher reloads very slowly. However, a well-placed Shotgun blast is often more helpful. As usual with your melee weapon, use it only when nothing else is available, or when your Shotgun runs out after backing them into a corner. As a Pyro, the Fire Axe is next to useless, as both of your other weapons are superior at close range, and your Flamethrower has a surprising amount of ammo. As a Demoman, your Bottle or Scottish Handshake is actually quite useful, as both of your other weapons are medium range, and deal self-damage within melee range, making a good Bottle smash good for ambushes, if not as good as a Stickybomb trap. As a Heavy, your fists are less powerful and fast than your Shotgun, which itself is worse than your Minigun. Do not use your Fists unless you have no other choice. As a Medic, your Bonesaw can find occasional use in emergencies, as your Syringe Gun does more damage than it in close-range situations, but can be bad for ambushes. As a Sniper, your melee weapon does less damage per second than your SMG, but your SMG runs out of ammo relatively quickly, forcing you to your melee weapon often enough.
   Keep your use of the stock melee weapon to emergencies and ambushes, and it will be a useful tool indeed.

TF2 Weapon Reviews: The Pistol

   This weapon review will be different from any other weapon review, as it will be explaining three basic weapons, as opposed to a specific weapon from a specific class. These weapons are the Shotgun, the Pistol, and the Shovel. The Shovel is just used as an example, the same stats apply to the stock melee weapons of the Pyro, Demoman, Heavy, Medic, and Sniper. This Weapon Review is about the Pistol.

   The Pistol is the stock secondary weapon for the Scout and the Engineer. It holds 12 shots per clip, and carries either 36 ammo(for Scout) or 200 ammo(for Engineer). This weapon fires bullets that do 13-17 damage at medium range, which means a full clip emptied at medium range will do 156-204 damage, which is enough to kill any class except the Heavy at max damage. At close range, the Pistol does 22 damage per shot, and at long range, the Pistol does 8-10 damage per shot. Crits do 45 damage per shot. The time between shots is 0.17 seconds, and the reload speed is 1.36 seconds for the Engineer, 1.25 for the Scout. The Pistol reloads by clips. The bullet spread recovery time is 1.25 seconds, which means that if you wait that amount of time between shots, each bullet will be perfectly accurate. The Lugermorph has exactly the same stats as the Pistol.
   The Pistol is a surprisingly useful long-range weapon. It fires faster and more accurately than the primary weapons of the classes that use it, making it helpful for hitting moving targets or covering your retreat. It can be surprisingly effective at close range, dealing around 220 DPS at point-blank range, and has a faster reload speed than the Shotgun, which only does 138-144 DPS at point-blank range. It carries 4 spare clips for the Scout, and 16.67 spare clips for the Engineer. At longer ranges, both the Scattergun and Shotgun do less damage than the Pistol, making it very useful indeed.
   As a Scout, the Pistol is more of a last resort while retreating. At close range, your Scattergun will deal more damage, but the Scattergun is inaccurate at longer ranges. Use the Pistol to deal consistent damage to close-range specialists from a distance, or spray a barrage of Pistol shots to cover a retreat. As an Engineer, your Pistol has more than enough clips to keep you firing for a long time. Use the Pistol to check for Spies at longer ranges, or to take out Stickybombs near your buildings. If you use it right, the Pistol is an incredibly versatile tool to help you and your team survive.

TF2 Weapon Reviews: The Shotgun

TF2 Weapon Reviews will be exactly what they sound like.

   This weapon review will be different from any other weapon review, as it will be explaining three basic weapons, as opposed to the loadout slot of a specific class. These weapons are the Shotgun, the Pistol, and the Shovel. The Shovel is just used as an example, the same stats apply to the stock melee weapons of the Pyro, Demoman, Heavy, Medic, and Sniper. I will be reviewing those three weapons over the next three Weapon Reviews.

   The Shotgun is the primary weapon for the Engineer, and the stock secondary weapon for Soldier, Pyro, and Heavy. It hold six shots when fully loaded, and carries 32 ammo.This weapon fires 10 pellets per shot that each do 6 damage per pellet for base damage, dealing 24-67 damage at medium range per shot. At close range, the Shotgun can do up to 90 damage if all pellets hit, which makes it able to kill even a full-health Heavy in four shots. Crits do 18 damage per pellet, dealing 180 damage if all hit, which is enough damage to kill any class except the Soldier and Heavy in one direct hit. The time between attacks is 0.6 seconds, and the reload time for all six rounds is 3.5 seconds. The Shotgun reloads shell by shell.
   The Shotgun is a powerful and underrated weapon that newer players will ignore completely. However, an experienced player knows to be wary, as an accurate shooter can easily kill almost any class at close range, while still being able to do solid damage to crowds at medium range, due to the large pellet spread of the weapon. It carries six full 'clips,' including the six shots you start with, as well as two extra shots. That is more than enough rounds to do serious damage with such a basic weapon. At long ranges, however, the power of this weapon becomes less than that of a Pistol shot, making it bad for precise, powerful shots.
   As a Soldier, the Shotgun is incredibly useful in close combat, as it does more damage than your Shovel, and your Rocket Launcher would do just as much damage to you. The Shotgun is not nearly as good for the Pyro, due to the Flamethrower being mainly a close range weapon anyway, however it is quite effective against enemy Pyros. The Shotgun is pretty much useless for the Heavy compared to the Minigun at similar ranges. However, when your Minigun runs out of ammo, a Shotgun can be your greatest ally. The Shotgun is the Engineer's base weapon and the basis behind all of the Engineer's primary weapons (except the Pomson, but that will be discussed later.) As such, it is your primary source of damage when your Sentry isn't built, or for defending against Spies. As I said, the Shotgun is a powerful weapon at close ranges, making it worthy of use when it is needed.

Quest for Geosend: Location

Quest for Geosend is a series about a nation I am considering creating, and yes, I am actually somewhat serious. We have plans and everything, though we do need a few billion dollars...

Now, after creating a proper system for how Geosend will be put together(a topic I will discuss in later episodes of QfG), we needed to know where to put it. Making a magic sky castle floating over the White House just because it would be a massive dick move would be awesome. However, we can't do it with our technology levels. Therefore, it was decided that buying an island would do nicely, no matter the expense.

Our first option thus far is Iglusuaktalialuk Island, which is a Canadian island that is about 20-25 square miles in size, which is probably fine for a small country. Not much is really known about it at this point, and there is no easy way to buy such an island other than negotiations with Canadia. An image is linked here--> http://wikimapia.org/#lat=57.336873&lon=-61.695442&z=10&l=0&m=b

Our second feasible option is Port Island, which is also a Canadian island in Nova Scotia. This island is a good deal smaller, only about 250 acres, which is probably not good enough for a country. However, it does have a way of buying it legally for only 658 thousand American dollars. The site linked at the end of this paragraph says that two small pieces of land on the island are not for sale, and the owner of said pieces is unknown. Bit weird if you ask me...http://www.vladi-private-islands.de/en/island+buy+port-island+nova-scotia+canada-east-central/

Our third and last good option is Batchawana Island, which is another Canadian island in Ontario. This one is 13 square miles, which is fairly workable for a small nation. It also costs about 16.5 million dollars. That should give you a good idea of how much Iglusuaktalialuk might cost. Batchawana is close to the mainland of both Canadia and the US, but that isn't as big of a problem...right? http://www.vladi-private-islands.de/en/objects/canada-east-central/ontario/sale/batchawana/

Blog Quest 3: The Blogenatening

It is I, once again, deciding to make a blog for no obvious reason. I always tend to try and get one going, but they often decide to say "Haha screw you" and die out before a week has passed. Will this one? Well, judging by the fact that I'm writing a(to be quite fair)pretty boring opener to this blog, chances are not looking good. So I said "Balls to you, other blogs" and started this one. Actual useful, informative, interesting, amusing, or bloody useless ramblings will go here over the next few days.